Reality Check
Now comes the time when my feet land back on the ground and I am no longer blinded.
Blinded by what? The dude I was into. Yes, I am using past tense my friends. Why so quickly? Because the dude is “just not that into me.” Have you read that book, “He’s just not that into you.” Great book. Changed my life and gave me an awareness that I wouldn’t trade for the world. I am still available to him, but my gut tells me that he won’t change. I don’t like what my gut says, but I believe my gut and plan to stand by my gut unless proven otherwise.
Here’s how it goes with showmances - either they work or they don’t. I don’t know of anything that ever happens in the gray area. We may not be in the same show, but because of our shows - that is how we met.
Where did my feelings go with this gentleman? Man, they didn’t, but they were ready to go all the way. Absolutely. When I know how I feel or if I really like someone, it is not a math problem. It is not something to apologize about … and it is definitely a waste of the moment to hold it back. I love being in-tune with my feelings and my dreams. That is a great thing about me. I am confident in my feelings even if it may not be a common feeling felt amongst a group of people. I don’t force my feelings on others, but I support myself 100%. If I am meant to learn that I am not listening or being attentive to another human because I am too focused on myself, I will figure it out when I am meant to figure it out.
For now, I love to sing in my life. In some ways, … literally. Ha! This wonderful guy, as great as he is, doesn’t want it. What exactly? I don’t know, but what I do know is that I don’t have any closed doors right now and he does. That’s fine for him, but it doesn’t work for me.
I love myself too much to put my dreams on hold.
March 19th, 2008 at 12:12 am
ok, that was strange…