Always Auditioning

Talk about first impressions on the first day. My nerves go wild when I have to sing in front of a bunch of people for the first time. I don’t doubt my singing ability. I simply get nervous with the concept of making a first impression on the rest of the cast. It is so easy to judge myself. I was actually a lot nicer to myself in my head this time. Instead of getting mad at myself for not hitting the right note aloud, I was saying (in my head) that I knew I would be able to hit the note properly once I had time to practice on my own.
Not much music to learn. The biggest thing for me to learn is the German accent. I had no idea that I needed to learn the German accent. That is a huge thing to take on, but I have time to get better at it more and more. If anything, I have to at least be able to sing with the German accent. I will work on it today and for awhile and improve on it over time.
I really like the people in the cast. Everyone seems extra nice and I feel lucky to be working amongst the group of talent. There is no snobbery. Only love in the room. I do fear that my personality may be too much for others, so I want to make a point to check in to make sure I am not offending anyone. I do realize that my humor can be overwhelming right at “hello.” It’s nothing I can change because my personality simply comes out as is and I don’t realize it may not be good to say that until it’s too late. Also, my innappropriate reactions to things just happen. I find myself laughing when I should not be laughing. My only reason for the laughter is because I think in my head, “Wouldn’t it be messed up if someone broke out into laughter right now?” And then I am the idiot who does it. Oy.
I am in the ensemble for the next two shows. Can’t lie. I’m bummed. I said yes to the contract because this is a great theatre to work with and I knew I would be so happy to be here. I only pray that I don’t get in a rut with the company and continuously do ensemble work. I have no control over those decisions and I have to keep reminding myself of the now. Right now, I have the time to relax a little more before I review the fun music before rehearsal today. Good times ahead!