Always Auditioning

I had my final night out in California last night. I went all out because once I get back to New York, it is all business. The auditions are just beginning to really start up and I need to keep up on maintaining my health, so partying hard is not an option. So, last night, I went out to a dance club called Aura in Pleasanton, California. The music was bumpin and the place was filled with amazing street dancers. I used up all my energy and then some on the dance floor that night. I couldn’t help myself. I was so happy to be there and I needed to take advantage of it. So, I danced and I danced hard. For anyone who is a dancer, they understand what I mean. I don’t do it everyday because it really exhausts me. At the end of the night, I had danced so hard that a sickness I was just getting over started to come back again - its the one going around in California where it hurts to swallow. No biggy. Now I have all day to heal back up and on Friday I will be back in New York and back to my busy life. Living the life a performer is very demanding. For me, going out happens ten times more often when I am on vacation. Not when I am working hard to get my next job … or even when I am doing a show.

I am a dancer and I have started to notice that I have lost flexibility in my back. So, I have decided to take immediate action. For those who know me, they are already aware of my love for yoga. I swear by it. It has helped me heal and strengthen all areas of my body. I now do yoga regularly (5 times per week) in place of ballet classes. Ballet only hurts my body now, so I do yoga to maintain my center, strength, and flexibility. Since I started doing yoga, I have gained more flexibility than I ever had in my ballet days. I just realized there is one major thing that I have not worked in a long time, my arebesque. It is a ballet pose/step that is very important to have and maintain for musical theatre (in my opinion). To get into action right away, I have added back stretching poses into my routine. It has made a huge difference in only two weeks. It is a small thing, but it will help me so much in auditions and in shows. I am happy about this small improvement I am making in myself. It will make a huge difference. I guess I could simply say that a little goes a long way.
Are you doing anything “little” for yourself?

Ah, man. I am going back to New York on Thursday night and I have to get more survivor jobs. It totally sucks, but a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do. If I didn’t care, I would have been stripping a long time ago. You laugh, but it is easy, fast money. I think it can pretty much be made without the government knowing and that is pretty cool. … but I can’t bring myself to do it, so I have been looking at other possible ways to gain an income - work at a video story or a dance club. I know good people who do this as a job and with that income, I could have my days free and work in the evenings. I can’t work too late due to early morning weekdays, but weekends would be flexible. These are all ideas for now and I will be going for them when I get into New York. I am trying to avoid working in a restaurant - that kind of work - yeah, I don’t like it much at all. Like many other performers, I am keeping my days open to audition. That is the most important things. I don’t like the lack of night jobs available, but I am grateful there is at least something available. If my ideas for possible survivor jobs have been helpful to you, that makes me happy. If you have any ideas you would like to add, I, along with many other, would love to hear your ideas.

I was on youtube.com looking to learn more about this style of dance called “House.” I fell in love with this dance style years ago when I was in college. That’s what I saw in the clubs and that what I am still hungrily trying to grasp. Come to think of it - we still have yet to have a broadway show with house dancing. Man, that would be off the charts. I love watching these talented people freestyle:

There is this whole groove involved that leaves me in awe. At the same time, when I watch it, I know I could do it if I could just break it down. But House is a street form of dance. Can it really be taught. I know, I know, that is a pretty lame question when people all around the world are taking classes in many forms of dance that were developed on the streets.

Ah, man, just watching this reminds me of my love for dance. You see, this is what it is all about. These videos totally bring out my love for this field. I love what I do for a living!

If you are looking to work with a photographer, you have to watch out for scam photographers like Chris Frampton. My dearest friend was just a victim of this photographer in Canada and I am straight up blogging about this con artist to prevent anyone else from being a victim of his bad business.
What happened? I will tell you what happened. During her photoshoot, the photographer made her feel uncomfortable. Is that really so bad? Yes! He was having her do these poses that made her feel awkward. My friend communicated that she felt awkward and he ridiculed her in response. He said she was not a professional and she had better do the poses otherwise she would look bad in her photos. My friend pushed through the shoot although she felt like crying the whole time. She finally got to let out her tears when she left the photoshoot. G-d forbid she didn’t seem “professional” and started crying in front of him right then and there. Dude, he made her freakin cry. Isn’t the whole point to make the model feel comfortable? Well, according to Chris Frampton, he has worked with plenty of people and no one else has ever had a problem. How does this turn into a scam? Shortly after my friend recovered from the abuse, she communicated to this poor excuse for a human being. He was resistant and said let’s wait until the photos come back. The photos came back alright and they were terrible. 500 bucks down the drain. Naturally, my friend wanted her money back. She didn’t get a single good shot and she suffered verbal abuse. Yes, what he did was a form of abuse. Look it up. Obviously, I am personally upset by this terrible photographer. For me, he became a scam artist when he refused to give her a full refund. If he was a true businessman, he would have quickly realized he had done an awful job and given back her money. He knows full well of how bad of a job he did and still runs away with the money. To me, that is slimy and simply bad business.
So, how do I want to conclude this? Well, if you are someone who has suffered from something similar, do me a huge favor. After you read this, pass it along to some friends. When they view it, ask for them to pass it along to other people. Once this gets enough hits, this link will be up on the top of a google search and less people will be a victim of Chris Frampton’s abusive photoshoots.

I have recently scene some of amazing demo reels put together by some highly talented people. For anyone who may question if these people are really THAT GOOD; I want to say yes! I don’t understand what some people’s hang ups are with demo reels. I think you can get a good taste of a person’s abilities from a demo reel. Seriously. And just think, if it looks that remarkable it looks on film, think of how much better it is live. I honestly wish everyone had access to a demo reel. Unfortunately, many people don’t have the money, the equipment, or the skills to put it together on their own.
… Maybe I am bias to these talented people because I have had the opportunity to work with them, see them perform, and to have been blessed to learn from them. These great people are working regularly, yes, but I want so much more for them. I guess there may not be enough room on Broadway or something? Really? Well, then make room! I think audiences are really missing out on all that is out there.
Alright, alright … here is a dance demo reel from a talented person who has made it big. He is fabulous, right?

Well, … so is she …

… I just really want all of us who love this so much to make it …

I saw Cheyenne Jackson on Broadway and was so bummed when I learned that he is gay. Now I am extra jealous of gay men. Cheyenne is talented, hot, and sexy. On stage, he is hilarious and holds himself as such a manly man. It’s hard not to drool all about it right away. While watching the show and being completely clueless on his actual sexual preferences, I imagined who in the show he might have been dating. I was instantly scheming how I would get him to end that showmance and be with me and make babies. Well, I didn’t get to the babies part because I it was distracting me from admiring his hot face. But Cheyenne is like one of the million gay men on Broadway who are just too hot to handle. This is not a complaint. If anything, it makes me even prouder of the industry I’m in.
If you are a performer, you see these hot men all the time at auditions. Do we flinch? No. We get to immune to all the hotness that it doesn’t phase us anymore. Well, I refuse to be like that. I want to appreciate all the beauty that is out there. Don’t you?

This takes so much time. You have to really be confident and know more about yourself to be able to have your own dance style in an audition. I have my own style but it wasn’t just from the years I took dance lessons. i was always exposing myself to different things and learning more about how my body preferred to move. I grew up as aballerina, but I learned that it hates to turn out and do plies. It doesn’t feel good to slowly extend my leg up. My body literally hurts the wrong way when I do it. So, if I am asked to dance freestyle in any dance form, that wouldn’t be my first choice. I am filled with extra, abnormal energy. In dance, I get to use it and explode. It’s so much fun and is not too much for others to handle. Well, at least I think that is the case … (heh, heh).
So, how about you? Have you identified how your body prefers to move. What make syou stand out the most when you dance? What do you have to offer? This may sound like lame, random questions, but not only should you ask yourself these questions, you should already be selling yourself that way all the time.

I am not “normal.” It took my awhile to learn this, but I have a different wave length that the average person. I can interpret things differently than anyone else and miss key points in a play because I am so fascinate by the way an actor carries him/herself. And when I make a choice, I do it huge. If I do any less, it feel like I am not putting an effort into it. The easiest way for me to interpret things is all or nothing. When someone asks for something in the middle, I get very confused because my world turn into this gray area and I don’t know which way to go. For me to give out this normal energy, I have to really focus on what is going on and trust that what I am experiencing in a scene will come across. It is scary and absolutely amazing at the same time. I find myself on this whirlwind and loving every minute I am on the stage. However, getting to that point is a slow process of experimentation for me. It takes me awhile to find the actual place I want to be. When I am given a note, I take it to the extreme. And if I misinterpret the note, I do my misinterpretation very strong, and therefore, very wrong. It’s not on purpose, it’s just my natural way of applying things. I often feel like the odd one in a group because I am always striving for perfection. I watch others work so professionally and am constantly learning. It is not easy to change the way I do things because I honestly don’t realize I am doing things to such an extreme in the first place. It’s normal to me.

Before I go into this blog, I must preface myself by saying that I have respect for all local performers. I have worked with some amazing, loving, and talented local performers who are still inspiring friends in my life. Also, in this blog, I am only speaking out of frustrations with the difficulty of getting a job.

Okay … here we go …

I am so annoyed with some theatres way of hiring local performers. When theatre’s are casting, they sometimes look to their local performers to save an extra buck and it pisses me off. It has nothing to do with who is right for the part; many times I find that it only helps them save money. I think it is unfair and only to the detriment of the show. The theatre pays local performers shit wages and leave hardly any room for negotiations. Plus, there is usually another non-local performer out there who is better suited for the role and the cast and the theatre completely ignores this. Okay, I may be going a little far on my rant here, but it is something that bothers me. I really believe that either local performer should be paid the same as the out of town performers. That way, people will really be cast appropriately (I’d like to believe). Dude … I don’t know… I don’t even know my point here … I just know that I am annoyed with the whole situation. How is it fair to anyone?

And here is a video of some random dude ranting:

Eating right is the way to go. I completely understand how this is not easy for people to do, but as a performer, you would not believe how much better you can perform when you are giving your body the right nutrients and portions. If I ate only crap, I would have a lot more weight on me, but that really is only part of it. I strongly believe that if I only ate a bunch of crap everyday, I would not look as young and have as much energy. You are what you eat. Honestly, I used to not really understand that saying.
Perfect example: for my New Years trip to Tahoe, I ate out most of the time and didn’t always eat the healthiest things. Did it have an effect on my energy? Absolutely. If I avoided the yummy crappy breakfast foods, my body would have started off from a much better place. I know it is hard to resist some of that fabulous food. I totally agree - the stuff is good. But eating only lasts so long and you have to work with your body for the rest of the day … and the rest of your life.

I just saw a new play at the Berkeley Repertory Theatre title “Arabian Nights.” It was a fabulous cast of Equity performers. I must say I was disappointed with the nonunion performer. Compared to the rest of the group … well, let’s just say that she didn’t compare. Personally, I have learned that I have difficulty remembering to project my voice on the stage. Well, in this girl had the same problem and it made all her choices look weak on the stage. I quickly lost interest in her as I watched the show. Anytime she delivered a line, the energy of the show dropped. She had this one moment in the second act with a song solo. I couldn’t tell if she was riffing or just missing the notes. Do not misunderstand. This does not mean that I think she was a bad performer. By all means, no. But compared to the rest of the cast, she was weak. I really care about this because she was the only nonunion performer. Man, if I was the only nonunion performer in a cast, I would really step up to the plate. Personally, I feel in this business that you have to fight a little more for a good reputation as a performer if you are nonequity. Man, I am totally disappointed. I really wanted her to kick some ass.
P.S. On a totally different note, the show was excellent. A must see!

I apologize for not blogging for like 5 freakin days. Spending the New Year in Lake Tahoe with no internet connection and then coming home to a blog that I just couldn’t log onto did the trick.

So, to make up for it, I have posted 5 blogs (BELOW THIS BABY). I actually like all of the blogs. Enjoy. Comment away.

… and HAPPY NEW YEAR!

So, you probably have noticed that I haven’t been on the blog for a bit. Why? I have been dancing my butt off. I went to Lake Tahoe (Nevada/CA) for the New Year with a bunch of talented dancers. These are not trained dancers. They are regular people, who have learned to dance from clubbing. I love these people! I learn so much and have so much fun when I am out with each person. They don’t care if they are the only people on the dance floor. If anything, they are happy to meet new people. For them, it is all about having a good time. Being around them is very helpful for me because they are into dancing simply for the fun of it. When dancing becomes a job, it is easy to forget that fact. Having a couple days with these inspiring people only makes me want to learn more. They awaken my craving to learn more, improve, and practice. I haven’t had that craving for dance in a long time. I love to dance, but I hardly go to dance classes simply because I am just not interested. But now, I want to learn more. I want to keep moving forward in my dance skills. It’s great! I’m all inspired. It’s amazing how much of an effect other dancers can have on each other.

GOALS FOR 2009

1) Regularly work in challenging, growing roles in theatre.
a. Showcase my best work at auditions.
b. Present a resume that makes me good for roles.
c. Grow in stage confidence and take risks.
d. Believe in myself.
e. Surround self with supportive people.
f. Get video of every role and send video to previous employers.
g. Give it to G-d when I’m on stage.
h. Read a play a month.
i. Practice, practice, practice!
j. Do my very best with every gig.
2) Submit proposals for music funding and write music with guitarists.
a. Organize ghetto recordings.
b. Organize songs I want to work on and work on them.
c. Post guitarist search ad on craigslist.
d. Submit proposal to NYFA funding & fiscal sponsorship – Total of 133,489.04.
e. Submit proposal to Chashama, Inc. – 5,000.
f. Submit proposal to Constance Saltonstall Foundation for the Arts – 5,000.
g. Submit proposal to Creative Capital Foundation – 60,000.
h. Submit proposal to Southern Theater Foundation – 4,000.
i. Pay NYFA to help with proposals.
j. Write a new song every week.
3) Grow in healthy and spiritual life
a. Commit to a schedule that gives me regular, set times to relax.
b. Eat grain only in the morning & stick to veggies and protein lunch and dinner.
c. Get enough sleep/embrace napping.
d. Walk everywhere I go.
e. Yoga – 5 times per week.
f. Cardio – 3 times per week.
g. Maintain weight between 116-120 by having less grain and more veggies.
h. Give 2 hours to digest before anything.
i. Keep track of weight and adjust accordingly.
j. Regularly take vitamins, acid reflux pills, and do neti-pot.
4) Be in a committed relationship.
a. Dress nicely.
b. Embrace who I am.
c. Stick to what I want in a man.
d. Be myself.
e. Be fully available.
f. Show if interested.
g. Let guy make the first move.
h. Let the guy chase.
i. Communicate.
j. Believe it will happen.
5) Get/Work Survivor Jobs that Keep me Happy
a. Research once per week and submit.
b. Apply to work for Roundabout 3 times per week (Tues – Wed).
c. Post regular ad and make flyers for demo reel business.
d. Find out what apple.com has to offer – go to NY office.
e. Continue catering/babysitting Thurs/Fri night & Saturday/Sunday all day.
f. Contact Pedro for private dance lessons.
g. Type up an interview or interview a person when have time.
h. Contact Steve for voiceover work.
i. Write one article per month for newspaper or magazine.
j. Organize and keep track of findings/follow-ups.
6) Successful Self Promotion
a. Sending holiday cards to previous employers.
b. Keep website updated.
c. Send footage of latest performance to previous/interested theatres.
d. Always have business cards on hand.
e. Make auditions a priority.
f. Look my best/right for the part at auditions.
g. Do research on shows auditions for & the theatres auditioning for …
h. Send postcards to theatre after audition.
i. Finish updating audition book.
j. Attend UPTA or Midwest Audtion.
7) Find a hometown that works with my goals.
a. Research Brooklyn homes and areas.
b. Learn about the market.
c. Research methods of transportation to New York.
d. Research jobs in the area.
e. Organize and record findings.
f. Research dance clubs in the area.
g. Research yoga, waxing salons, and gyms.
h. Research dance classes.
i. Research community activities and things to do.
j. Research temples, coffee shops, and stores in the area.
Grow as a Performer
a. Learn/listen/expose self to Italian Dialect.
b. Continue voice therapy.
c. Work with Kate Chadwick once per month.
d. Memorize new monologues.
e. Find an acting studio with work study.
f. Regularly rehearse new/old songs.
g. Read books on acting.
h. Stretch arabesque and side split regularly.
i. Take an acting lesson once per week.
j. Learn new house move every week.

9) Maintain Finances
a. Update Quicken monthly.
b. Maintain budget in daily planner.
c. Keep organized with tax- deductibles for taxes.
d. Learn to type numbers faster.
e. Get new folder for 2009 finances.
f. Organize closet with tax stuff from the years.
g. Negotiate honestly – with purpose and confidence.
h. Do turbo tax in January and send out.
i. Reset budget in January and start over.
j. Organize bills on calendar & create alarms.
10) Finish Book
a. Type up interview answers.
b. Interview 70 or more people and type in interview.
c. Map out section on self promotion.
d. Write out interview questions for agents.
e. Organize chapters.
f. Interview editors.
g. Read book about publishing/book business.
h. Have Sarah read it and critique – what can be cut/what doesn’t make sense?
i. Compile interviews into chapters and fill in the gaps.
j. Do two to four interviews per week and be done with 70 by the end of Sept ‘09.